It Was Always About Family
by CCWhite
Summary: Sam leaves Dean after the hunt in over. Criticism welcome. ONE SHOT


**Disclaimer: Don't own them, would like to but life's not fair. **

It Was Always About Family

Five days after the Winchesters had finally killed the demon that had destroyed their family 25 years ago, Sam left Dean. Just packed his bags and left before Dean had even woken up.Within a week he was settled back in Stanford.

For the first few weeks, he tried calling Dean, but Dean never answered anymore, and after a while, the phone number was changed, and a new number never given. Sam tried to call his dad, and dad answered, but never told him where Dean was, or how to get in touch with him. Sam asked his dad to have Dean call, but Dean never did.

Four years later, Sam couldn't even remember his dad's number. He lost if from his phone list and though he tried a few times to find it and his dad, after a while he gave up.

Life had become busy for Sam, classes, tests, bar exams, and a woman to fill his life. Ten years after Sam had walked out of his family's life, Sam had almost everything he ever wanted. He became a junior partner at a large firm, and had his own office, waiting to put enough time in to become a full time partner. He knew his chances were good. He was good at what he did.

He had married Heather, small, blond, who almost reminded him of Jess, though she didn't have Jess's humor, personality, or love for Sam. But she was one of the partners' sister and he made good with that. They had two children, a large four-bedroom house with a large yard, no picked fence, but that's ok, it would do. Sam was content with his 'normal' life.

On the morning of the twelfth year since he walked out of the motel room for the last time, Sam received a phone call.

His secretary had transferred the call to him, after warning him, about a possible client that might need to be brushed off. The partnership only dealt with 'certain' clientele, and nobody with an annual income of less than six figures was ever taken.

"Hello, Sam Winchester?" The voice was a woman's. Heavy accent, European of some sort, Sam guessed.

"Yes, this is Sam Winchester, how may I help you?"

"My name is Marianna, you Dean's brother?"

Sam was taken aback. Dean? Was he still even alive? Sam rushed his words out. "Yes, yes, do you know where he is? Is he ok? I haven't been able to find him. Is he ok?" Sam knew he sounded like an hysterical woman, but he didn't ever think he'd hear from Dean again.

"Yes, I know Dean, you come to the house?" And she rattled off an address that was located a few hours away from his own home. Dean in California? He wrote the address down, and the woman hung up without even a good bye.

Sam ran a hand through his unruly hair, still brown, still looking messy no matter what he did to it. He had stopped looking for Dean, what, ten years ago? He figured Dean didn't want to be found. He figured Dean had never forgiven him for walking out again. And to tell the truth, he could have found Dean if he really wanted to, but didn't, because he really, really did not want to face his brother.

But now there was this phone call, and an address. So, what happened? Was his brother hurt from a hunt and was taking shelter in some motel? Was he so badly hurt that he needed to get a hold of Sam for good-bye? Nah, Dean would have called him. So, how did this woman know his number?

Sam went home that night, to his perfectly normal house, his two kids that he barely saw because of work, his wife, the perfect lawyer wife who could throw important dinners to impress the partners and the clients, who was beautiful to look at, and who's affections tended toward the material, but it would do.

It took Sam another week before he got nerve enough to go to the address given him by the woman on the phone. The house wasn't what he expected. The front yard was neat, with roses and assorted flowers mixed among the numerous toys and children running around, screaming and laughing. They stopped and looked at him with the unabashed curiosity that only children can manage.

He climbed the three front steps toward a mid-sized colonial, with red brick front and black shutters, noting it was quaint and attractive. The door was opened by one of the most beautiful women that Sam had ever seen. She was about 5'6", the sun catching red highlights in her auburn brown hair, soft curls around a face that reminded Sam of a younger Sofia Loren. Her large mouth stretched to a beautiful smile showing Sam small even teeth, and her large brown eyes glittered with curiosity and humor.

"Hi, I'm Sam." He stuttered, realizing how awkward the felt, and blushed.

"Ahh, si, Sam, come in". The voice was the same as the one on the phone.

She stretched out her arm to welcome him in her home, then extended her hand in introduction. "Sam, I'm Marianna, Dean's wife. It's good to meet you. Let me get Dean." Then conspiratorially she added in a whisper, "Dean doesn't know I called you, it's a surprise" and she flashed him a smile that Sam felt all the way to his toes.

Sam was flabbergasted. Dean married? As Marianna walked away Sam heard a hysterical child screaming, "No papa, no!" Sam walked into what seemed to be the dining room and saw Dean dangling a boy about six years old by his left foot while the kid was laughing so hard Sam was afraid he'd go into convulsions.

Dean had a smile on his face that brought the past crashing down on Sam in an instant. He saw his brother and him in the Impala, at diners talking and laughing, in motel rooms making fun of tv shows. And the dozen years felt like a heavy weight on Sam's shoulders.

Dean looked up and froze when he saw his little brother. His hazel eyes widened in surprise, and Sam almost thought he saw pleasure, but it quickly gave away to a wariness that had Sam wondering if this was such a good idea after all.

"Sam" was all Dean said. He grabbed the laughing boy by his shoulders and slowly raised him and set himtenderly on the floor. The boy turned toward Sam and stared at him with his father's eyes. Dean looked down at his son, "Johnny, go play", he saidgently and the boy ran off giggling.

Dean was still staring at Sam when Marianna came in the room carrying a child looking about a year old. This one had his mother's dark auburn hair, large brown eyes and his father's infectious smile, and Sam's heart lurched. For some reason Sam felt a lump in his throat that he quickly swallowed and Marianna said, "Dean, bring your brother in the kitchen, we can talk and eat." Her accent was endearing and Samlaughed soflty. Dean extended his arm for Sam to follow him, but he never touched his brother.

The kitchen was large, airy and smelled so good, that the young Winchester's stomach grumbled loudly, embarrassing him and entertaining the large crowd sitting around the table. There was a bustle of movement and introductions that confused Sam, then he found himself seated, with a plate of food and a bottle of beer. The guests in Dean's house talked around Sam, but Marianna and Dean sat next to him.

A large bay window looked out into the back yard and Sam saw more children running, playing and being the little savages that children are. He laughed as he looked at Dean, "How many are yours" he asked jokingly.

"Five" Dean replied, his voice reflecting his pride, and his eyes straying toward his wife. Sam saw something he never thought he'd see in Dean's eyes. Total love and devotion. Looking at Marianna, he saw the same strong mutual feelings in her eyes for her husband. Catching his bottom lip between his teeth, Samuel Winchester swallowed his food hard. He would have killed to see that look in his own wife's eyes.

"Five!" he exclaimed, then started laughing. He was glad to see Dean joining him, then Dean's eyes left his and welcomed the man walking inside the kitchen behind Sam. Sam turned and almost chocked on the piece of cheese he was eating. John stood behind him, smiling. Before Sam knew it, John had him in a welcoming hug, whispering how much he had missed him. "Why didn't you come to visit me?" Sam asked. " I didn't think you wanted me to" was John'smild reply.

"Why wouldn't I want you to?" Sam was confused.

"I tried a couple of times, but was turned away, both in the office you worked in and at your home."

Sam's heart sank, and he felt the blood drain from his face.

"I never knew" he stated, his voice trembling, "nobody said anything."

He looked at Dean, but Dean found the checkered tablecloth more interesting than the dismay in his brother's face.

"Well, it doesn't matter", John tried to gloss over the awkward moment, "you're here."

Sam stayed for six hours at his brother's house. He learned that Dean and John had taken residence in a small house owned by an Italian woman who was more than willing to sacrifice some of the rent money in exchange for house maintenance. This Italian woman had ten grown children, including Marianna, whom Dean fell in love with the first time he saw her and worked long and hard to win her. To hear her side, she was more than willing to have Dean, but felt he might not stay long, and held her feelings back. But once he won her, she realized there would never be another man for her. And so they had married ten years ago. The Winchester brood had started soon after and now Dean had children ranging from 9, Dean Jr to young Sammy, just one. Sam had already met Johnny, but hadn't seen Maria, 7, and Antonette 3, named after Marianna's father Anthony. The household was filled with Dean, Marianna, their five children, Marianna's mother Memma, who helped clean and cook and John, who helped take care of the house and yard, and told his grandchildren stories. Dean and John worked at a nearby garage, and came home for lunch, Dean enjoying his wife, John enjoying the comforts of a home he lost so long ago.

Sam told Dean and John about his job, about his impending partnership, about his wife and two children. As the Winchester men got reacquainted with each other, the crowd around the kitchen dispersed and soon Sam decided it was time for him to go home. His father gave him a hug good-bye, admonishing him to stay in touch, then took Sam's cell number down. Marianna gave him a warm hug with a plate of cookies to bring home, and Dean gave him a handshake that, though it was his brother's usual strong, firm grip, lacked the warmth that Sam didn't realize he missed till now. But Dean just looked at him with his guarded eyes, and said good-bye.

When Sam Winchester arrived at his own home, he was filled with a bittersweet sadness. He had found Dean, but realized he had lost Dean. The void that Sam had created when he left him was now filled with an overabundance of family and friends, and Sam felt the outsider. A stranger in his own brother's eyes. The large house echoed his footsteps as he made his way up to his bedroom. His children were not outside playing in the dusk like Dean's kids. Instead they played with their computer games, or watched tv. In the house at a certain time, that was the rule. His wife's rule. Heather was in the bedroom, brushing her long blond hair, her slim figure so different from Marianna's voluptuous one. His house was large, roomy and filled with empty echo, Dean's was smaller, filled to capacity with family, and the sound of children and laughter.

Sam felt the emptiness of his own home, and it reflected the emptiness of his own life. He had what he wanted, but it wasn't what he needed.

Three weeks later Sam brought his children to his brother's house. Marianna greeted him at the door with a warm hug, while her children engulfed Sam's, an amoeba engulfing food, was the only way Sam could describe the way his children disappeared into the unruly mob that grabbed them.

Marianna laughed, "don't worry, they will be ok here. Dean and his father are working at the garage. It is only two blocks down the street, turn left at the first corner and you will be able to see it." She waved him good-bye and Sam decided to walk the two blocks. Arriving at the garage, Sam was greeted by a bustle of busy mechanics and chatty customers. Dean was standing in an office looking over an order form, a pensive frown on his handsome face, and Sam noticed Dean's hair had a touch of gray. When did that happen? But it's been such a long time and Dean was what? In his early forty's now? Sam shook his head, the time had flown.

Sam gave a small cough, and his brother looked up, a confused expression replacing the contemplative one. "Sam? Did you car break down?" Dean snarked, and Sam was glad to hear the sarcasm in his brother's voice. "Nah, just thought I'd come to visit" Dean gave him a puzzled frown before a voice broke in "Boss, there's a customer that needs his car done, says it's a rush, but all the mechanics are busy." The man who spoke wore a mechanic's uniform with the name "Sing" written on the pocket. "Ok, I'll take care of it" replied Dean, and the mechanic went off.

"This is yours?" Sam said, his arm waiving around encompassing the ten-bay garage.

"Yeah," Dean smiled, "I own it with Dad and one of my brother in laws. I know what they say about forming a partnership with family" he continued, holding up a hand when Sam started saying something, "but, I'm willing to take the risk." And Dean gave Sam a look that the younger brother didn't want to interpret, for his own sake.

"So, what're you doing here, Sam? Don't you have to be at the office?"

"Yeah, but, I have a couple of days, and I thought I'd like to see you again. My kids are at your house, lost, I think" Sam joked.

The younger Winchester stayed for a while, watching Dean work, then left, unnoticed by his brother who was engrossed in the mechanics of a BMW that needed a rush brake job.

Stopping by the house to pick up his children, he felt taken aback when they actually protested, and wanted to stay longer. Eventually he got them in the car with the promise that they would be back soon.

A few days later Marianna called Sam to invite him over for a family gathering. Sam had given specific instructions to his secretary that the calls from Marianna were to be forwarded to him, with no delay. Sam also realized that it was Dean's wife who kept initiating the unions between brothers, Dean never called him. John had a couple of times, but not Dean.

It was a beautiful Sunday morning when Sam arrived at Dean's house for the family reunion. He had brought his wife Heather, and their two kids, John 11, and Deanna 9. The front and back yards were filled with enough people to populate a small country, and the number of children had more than quadrupled since the first time Sam had come to Dean's house. Marianna again welcomed him with a warm embrace, and also embraced Heather and his two children, before another swarm of children ate his two up and disappeared amongst the crowd. Dean greeted Sam with a handshake, and just nodded at Heather. She gave a small smile, and looked nervously around, expecting to be manhandled by the carefree, laughing group around them. Marianna took Heather by the arm and led her off, while Sam and Dean walked to the back yard for hamburgers and beer.

"It's quite a crowd" Sam exclaimed.

"Yeah," smiled Dean. Sam watched as Dean casually walked among his family and friends, laughing, and joking, completely at ease. 'When had his brother become such a social butterfly?' Thought Sam.

The day went fast, the brothers talked with each other and John, and Sam met some Marianna's brothers, and her two sisters, Rosa and Colombina. He played bocce, and football, and at the end, found his wife sitting in the house by herself, because the crowd was getting too much for her. Sam gathered his children and bade his brother good bye.

"Please Sam, next time, leave me home" whined Heather in the car.

"Why?" Sam asked, confused. He had had a blast. The he realized Heather's idea of a family gathering was a formal dinner, the children tucked away somewhere, quiet, a few drinks, and the minimum of noise, nothing above 'civilized' noise level.

"Those people are not of our class, Sam" she spat bitterly.

"Yeah," Sam acknowledged. Dean didn't have the couth, his family was oversized and loud, and all these things grated on Heather's more refined, spoiled tastes. So Sam began going to his brother's house without her, bringing his children, who loved it there, and leaving his wife home to her large empty house, because, she would not accept his family, and really, did she even love Sam?

Three years after Sam got reacquainted with his brother and father, he put his house up for sale. Heather was furious, and threatened to divorce him and take everything. However, Sam was an excellent lawyer, and a careful one. He had made partnership, and this divorce would break him from the firm, but he didn't really care anymore now did he? He went to court with pictures and a private investigator's report that Heather had been cheating on him for the past five years with one of the partners, who also happened to be Sam's rival. For the final divorce agreement, Sam took only his children and half the money accumulated in a mutual savings. He left Heather the house, the yard, and her lover.

Dean was surprised when his brother bought a house three doors down from his. He gave Sam a puzzled frown when Sam told him he was moving in the neighborhood. His children loved Dean's children, nieces, nephews and all other kids that found their way to the older Winchester's yard to play. Sam quit the firm and opened up a small office not far from his new home. He had no worries about his children, because there was always someone at Dean's house to take care of them. Sam and Dean got together almost every night to talk, but Dean never called Sam, 'Sammy' any more. And the wary look never disappeared from his hazel gaze.

"You almost broke him," John told him one evening when the elder Winchester had come to see Sam's new house. "The last time you left, Dean became almost a hermit, wouldn't leave the motel room, drank and almost got himself killed on a hunt. I found him after Joshua called me to warn me that my eldest son was on a suicidal path. So, I took him to live with me at Memma's house, and you know the rest." John gave Sam a sad smile. "It will take a long time for him to trust you again, Sam." John's youngest son realized that his father was telling him to be patient. It took Sam just fifteen minutes to destroy that trust when he abandoned Dean without even a good-bye. It's been three years since they found each other again, and Dean was still distant, careful, and waiting for Sam to leave again.

Sam knew that the special place in Dean's heart that had held only room for Sammy was now over-filled with family and friends, and Sam was relegated to distant relative. But Sam was nothing if not persistent, and he began to work his way back to that special place with the same doggedness he had shown all those years ago when they were hunting demons. He knew he'd never take Marianna's place, nor Dean's children's place in his brother's heart, but he sure as hell could kick his brothers' in law and sisters' in law out, and heck, he'd even kick his dad out of there, because Sam wanted that special place back, and he was going to do everything in his power to make sure he'd get it.

It took a another year before Dean started calling Sam 'Sammy' again, and two more before Sam saw the wariness disappear from Deans gaze, and the mischievous glean replace it. In the meantime, Marianna's sister Rosa had taken a liking to Sam, and had instilled herself in Sam's life with the gentle persistence only a woman in love could manage. She was nothing like Heather. Rosa was dark, dark hair, almost black, large dark eyes and olive skin and so affectionate, and Sam thought she was beautiful and felt flattered that she would be interested in him. Rosa loved Sam's children, and allowed them to run outside and play till dusk, to visit their cousins, and Sam's children never missed the tv or fancy toys they used to play with. The young Winchester saw his children come home with rosy cheeks and bright eyes, and carefree smiles, and smelling of outdoors and sunshine. Deana's golden hair was now a mess of tangles that would take some time to unknot. Her coltish legs a telling sign that she would be tall, and beautiful. Hi son John was already taller then most kids in his class and he sported the same wild brown hair his as his father, now made even more unruly by the wind, his large blue eyes shining with excitement at his latest wildlife find, a small frog that he decided to keep. Sam laughed and told him they'd have to find a place to put it, and sent his kids to bed.

"What made you give up hunting?" Sam finally asked one evening, while he, John and Dean were sitting out in the back yard, drinking beer, their children playing in the encroaching gloom. Dean allowed his children to be out in the dark, but never alone. He was always there, watching them, him or John.

John looked from Sam to Dean, waiting for his older son to answer. John thought he knew, but, with Dean, you never really know.

The older brother gave a smile, "I decided that keeping my family safe from the hardships and quirks of life was just as important." He replied, his mellow voice exuding contentment and peace with himself, the peace Sam couldn't give him, because Sam never had it himself. And it was as simple as that. The woman who loved him more than anyone ever had, who had filled the void created by Sam with more family than Dean ever thought he would have, who turned the loner into a warm hearted, happy man with friends who constantly seemed to be dropping by for this or that, who looked on him for security, knowing he would provide it because he was who he was. Marianna had given Dean a reason to give up the hunt, just by loving him.

Later that evening Sam lay in bed with Rosa next to him, feeling her warmth, the swell of her belly holding their little Sam, knowing she loved him the way Heather never had, and realizing that since they had married, almost two years now, he no longer had dreams of Jess. He hadn't really thought of Jess, not since he became determined that he was going to reclaimhis family. He had succeeded, and Jess had disappeared from his dreams. Her good-bye had been soft, like a whisper,and he felt at peace, knowing she would always be important to him, but now he was moving forward. With a small laugh, Sam realized that again, his big brother had saved his ass.


End file.
